Dirty feet....

Oh how I LOVE summer time.. I love when my feet are dirty because I can't remember the last time I wore real shoes.. Summers are way too short here in Germany. We get a couple of hot weeks and then the weather changes rapidly... I had a nice summer but my feet weren't dirty long enough... I wish the summer could return, just for a couple of weeks until I am really ready for winter and cold weather... Until I am ready for shoes...

My Mind is Occupied

I am looking for a job. I am still in Germany as most people know by now. Anxiety, depression and stress aren't a good combination when you want to move from Germany to the US all by yourself.

It just didn't work. I couldn't make it happen.

I was a wreck, I might still be one every now and then. So in a couple of weeks I had to change plans. I had to move all my stuff back in with my parents. That is where I am now. I have started applying for jobs in October and have had many job interviews, only to find out that I wanted to continue applying. I really feel that I shouldn't take the first offer, but that I should search for a job that I will enjoy going to. I have had 3 offers but they didn't feel right. I have had 6 interviews so far, maybe more and I have written over 40 applications.
While I am doing that I am working at the International School Wiesbaden as a sub. It is so much fun to work with the kids, it gives me something to do when I am not writing applications and I can save up the money for when I have to move again. Plus I have something on my resume that has to do with my college degree.
I got my bachelor in September in educational science and sciende of religion. My grade is a 1,7 which I am more than happy with. But I am dont with college. There is no energy left to do my master and I am fine with that. I can't wait to find work, a new place to live and start something new.
So if anyone knows about an open position as a "Pädagogin" feel free to contact me! ;) I want to go into the "Jugendhilfe". Next week I have an interview at a shelter for teen moms. I am looking forward to that.
I know some people were wondering where I was and what is going on in my life. I hope this is enough of an update. I just don't feel like writing about my feelings and thoughts at the moment.

The one thing I am actually enjoying at the moment is all the time i have to read books. I have read more books in the last 8 weeks than some people read in a life time! :)
Right now I am reading the 3rd part of Stieg Larrsons books, I have enjoyed Arne Dahl, Jussi Adler-Olsen and many more. I am lookign forward to the cronicles of narnia and lord of the rings!

Out of Focus....

See that big tire? That is probably what I should be focussing on. I should be focussing on the big picture.

...but I get caught up in between.. I always get stuck in the smaller things, those that aren't important and I have a problem letting go of those. I am working on it though but it sure is hard. I wish I was just able to let go of those and focus on what really matters.

Lazy days....

I love this pic that I snapped on the market in Marocco...
Just looking at him makes me smile. He is so carefree and looks peaceful... There is no stress or bustle... Only peace.... I wish I was like that.. He doesn't seem to be rich when it comes to material things, but he is happy...